Monday, November 2, 2009

opening paragraph

I am putting the finishing touches on my paper but I was wondering any of ya'll have the time to give me feedback on my opening paragraph, here it is:

In the second episode of Joss Whedon’s series Firefly, “The Train Job,” the Captain, Malcom “Mal” Reynolds, and his crew accept a job to steal an unknown government shipment that is traveling on a train. With the events that transpire, and from this angle the story in this episode is told, Mal’s is without a doubt one of the “good guys,” which illustrates how powerful seeing a story from a particular angle can be. Displaying both sides of an issue is important because it allows the individual to decide where they stand. All to often, the media frames the minds of the general public and they have minimal control of what they think. If multiple news sources are looked at, one is able to get a more rounded view of the issue at hand and therefore form their own opinion on the matter. Joss Whedon shows the viewer, through his criminal protagonists, that if one gets to know the other side, their feelings on the given matter may change.

3 comments:

  1. The sentence, "All to often, the media frames the minds of the general public and they have minimal control of what they think", made me ask what they think of what? I think you could add something to this sentence to explain it better.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "If mulitple news sources are looked at, one is able to get a more rounded view of the issue at hand and therefore form their own opinion on the matter."

    I feel like this sentence did not flow smoothly. You could change a few words to make it work more.

    ReplyDelete